. "you see, deep down, i really DO know that things are going to be OK... that there are a million and two things that we can not test for, but that the numbers are on our side and that we do not need to subject our baby to the sometimes damaging side effects of testing... but he does not know that yet. he is really relying on my faith to carry us both through this pregnancy, and i just blew it by trying" . . .