. "But sex does get mixed up with other complicating things and it is up to each of us to unpack that baggage and travel as light as we can.No point blaming past and rehashing what is been and was long ago done.Just work with the present--right now, what is 'workin' for you/your parner, what isn't.Sex as a way to be hurtful of another, sex as retaliation, sex as reward, sex as a form of blackmail, sex" . . . .