. . . . "Anybody who is being honest about it has to admit: although ???reality??? can mean that marriage ends in divorce, that children suffer all kinds of horror and abuse, and people can be selfish, cruel, violent and utterly dishonest, ???reality??? also can mean that marriage is not only workable, but can be very, very good, that children are treasured and guided, and people can be selfless, kind, wor" .